im tired.

The weather here is beautiful! i went out side expecting to freeze today to get the mail and when i walekd out it was all sunny and warm yay! happy me. anyways i am goin ot work on the business and finish a papper and go hang out with stephanie from school. oh and no school today yay!

So.... i was sapose to work from 3-10 tonight. but i got a phone call this morning form work at like 7:30 asking if i could come into work sometime this morning and work until 3 adn then i wouldnt have to work tonight. My dad work me up at 8 and said to call them back, so i called them back and i said i would come in at 9 since i jsut got the message and was calling at 8. So i went in and worked from 9-3. I was so tired. i got off rwork last night at 10:30. it was a good night last night but it sucked getting woke up this morning but owell now i have my night free, not that i have anything to do but still never the less its free. So yeah that is about it.

Thanksgiving went well. So did balck friday. i will updat more when i get home from work. I work from 3-10.

i actually didnt want to leave work today i just kinda wanted to keep working. i was 2 dollars short of 40 today. owell lol not to bad for it being thanksgiving day lol. Chirstmas will be slamed lol. ok i am making christmas shoping list so everyone who reads this and who i know that i can get things for and either send them or hand them to comment on what you want. if you dont then i will be emailing and calling ect. to find out. This is so weird. this is going to be my last year as a family. My last family Christmas with grnadma/pa and everyone, everything. wow. i cant beleave it, its so surreal. Everything is happening fast and time is fling, i have so much to do before this happens, so much to plan, so much to get together. so much to say and tell. oh i cant wait though. In my heart i know that everything will work out. So, I wnet into work last night and Pat my mom's friend was like i hear you are going to tour all over Europe for the summer, i said yeah its goign to be a blast! and i couldnt wait to go off to Europe for the summer. it will be nice to go spend time with Casey and see Jason, Ulzii, and Slavin and the rest of Cirque crew agian. it will be some wild fun i can tell you that much! oh funfufn! well before i give all my secrets away fair well. happy holidays!

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

i just got home from working noon to five

~! HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL!!!~!

So i got my AP Eng grade up to a C and it will be a Strong B or an A soon after the holiday break, as soon as i get the paper in. I am going to have some people revise it and see what they think. My mom threatened to sign papers to move me into Regular Studies English, there is no way i am going into Reg. Studies. That class yes will be an easy A but come on everyone in there is either not to smart, in votech, or just plain lazy and dosnt want to learn. i am none of these. i just put shit off to the last min. Well I have a meeting with my IEP person today and my mom during 7th. I hope that goes well... I have been getting over a head cold for the weekend and going to work. i am feeling better not its jsut the ending symptoms of it. I cant wait til christmas now i mean its my favorite seaseon. I love the holidays. I jsut hate the way my family fights and picks at eachother when we all get together at grandma's. It sucks. But hey what can you do if i say something about it they will say stay out of it your not old enough or its not your place blah blah lol. whatever. i am happy today for somereason maybe its the grades. i beleave everything will work out as i want it to. Everything will be ok i have it ALL uner CONTROL now. Everything is going to be alright.

On a diffrent note, a Jason note. yes my mom can always and will always find a way to say "no" to me seeing him. even if i get streight "A's", so i will deal with it and so will he, well that isn't exactly how he put it but basicaly. We will make it work.

ok so yeah i know i dont sleep but its not like i can type when i am not sleeping. My Keyboard makes loud noises when i type. Its almost ten and i am wide awake. looks like i wont need no-doz after all. I guess my aunt B called my mom adnasked how i was and mom started to freak out and go on this shes not going to graduate thing....again. i serverly hate mylife right now not to mention myself.

i just want to step out of my body and watch like a movie sometimes i think that is waht is happening its not me at all.

gotta love hong kong and Richmound Hill Onterio, canada. the two anon. posters on my below entry. Yes they are from there. i trace shit, im bored ok. and paranoyed as hell. so yeah i am goin to work today at 5-10 woopie kids eat free therefore hopefully good business......

Thanks Jason for changing my link.
So anyways update time im a in first period. Nothing much to do. I cant wait until christmas it is my favorite time of the year. i love it.

I want to be a trophy wife!

Casey is coming home sometime around the 1st of December. since there tour ends in Japan the 27th of Nov. i am going to see if mom adn dad will let me go up to visit her sometime for maybe a weekedn or something in December before she goes on her London tour in January. this is her tour scheduale... this is for my own benifit if i dont have it done somwhere then i will forget it and stuff.
Oct 13-Nov 27 finish the Japan tour she is back in Tokyo for the 2nd time this year.
Jan. 5-29 she is in London GB
July 14-Aug 20 Amsterdam NL
Aug 31-Sep 28 Brussels BE
then Milan and Rome but i dont have the dates for that yet.

Anyways im doing alright im still alive lol. I went to see Saw II yesterday it was a great movie i want to mee the director and writter holy crap it was good!! I want to rent Saw I now. i hope that they come ou twith a Saw III. They need to its amazing~! I have mainly figured out some things in my life. Well kinda. I am realizing things and i am coming into reality. i still need to find mysefl but that is waht a vacation is for. Depending on what Casey says i mightbe spending some time in Amsterdam with her in July since i will be out of school then. Maybe if can convince my mom to let me get out of school for a few days take a short trip to London. All i would need is spending money for stuff if i eat out. My room accomidations and 3 meals a day will be provided by Cirque. I am still puttin ghtat into a possibility. I dont know there really isnt anywere else i could go all my family lives either in Pa or Oh. and the ones who live in Ca i dont know. But i do know that i do want to travel somwere and get out of Pa for a little while so that is what the summer will be for. I am waiting to tell some people some things when i see them face to face so i can explain better and my reasoningand whatever. this includes Casey and Jason. both for diffrent things but somewhat similar. I need to give Cydnee a call and see what she is up to. I am realzing that my parents wont be around forever to take care of me wich is sacary. i dont like the idea of me having to live alone by myself with noone to fall back on if i get in trouble or if i am in need of help. that is one of the downsides of being an only child. you dont have anyone. It isnt about growing up and going off on my own i can do that. i have grown up more then most people know. its jsut knowing that i wont have that security of family once they are gone. I like that security of having someone there for me. I am use to it. Even if i move away i still have them in some way. But if something would happen and that security is stopped my world croumbles and falls apart. I know people who have had heard lives and have been kicke out and have had to live on there own adn everything by themselfs and i dont want to have to do that i dont really think i can handle being alone bymyself haveing so much responsability and not have any support. I need that support. i was raised with support and i dont deal well without it like i cant handel it, like if i would ever slip up for somreason adn have noone to catch me or get sick adn noone to take care of me i will be screwed. so that jsut crossed my mind jsut now out of the blue.

i work tomarrow in the morning. yay. im hostesing so that is alright not to bad lol. well i need to finish my room and work on the business.